


stars

by godhateslev



Series: Tokomaru Stuff [4]
Category: Dangan Ronpa Another Episode: Ultra Despair Girls
Genre: Bisexual Fukawa Toko, Coming Out, Dancing in the Rain, Denial of Feelings, F/F, Feelings Realization, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Friendship Bracelets, I love these two idiots so much, Idiots in Love, Internalized Homophobia, Lesbian Naegi Komaru, Minor Naegi Makoto/Togami Byakuya, POV Fukawa Toko, POV Third Person, Post-Canon, Sexuality Crisis, Teen Romance, tokomaru brainrot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-04
Updated: 2021-03-04
Packaged: 2021-03-17 23:47:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,102
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29849340
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/godhateslev/pseuds/godhateslev
Summary: Touko should not like Komaru. It’s not even that Komaru is bad, because she really isn’t now that Touko actually knows her. It’s that Komaru is a girl. Even if she is really kind and pretty and makes Touko feel different than she ever has about anyone, Komaru is a girl. So she can’t love Komaru, because that isn’t right.***in which touko fukawa comes to terms with the fact that she might love her best friend
Relationships: Fukawa Touko/Naegi Komaru
Series: Tokomaru Stuff [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1944190
Comments: 12
Kudos: 53





	stars

**Author's Note:**

> yet another fic written in chem, sigh  
> back on my tokomaru shii *bites lip sexily* aaha

Touko Fukawa has always done things in a certain way.

Touko, ever since she was a child, has had a routine. Even when she is stuck in an unfamiliar school with fourteen people she doesn’t know, Touko will stick to her routine. Touko sticks to what always works for her, and she has no plans to change it.

Syo does not do things in any particular way.

Syo, for as long as she can remember, has done everything out of impulse. Syo’s decisions are sporadic, even when she’s sure her choices will cause harm. Syo, unlike Touko, does not find comfort in repetition.

Syo and Touko are not the same person. Truly, they couldn’t be any more different. But the one thing that they find themselves sharing (besides Touko’s body, of course,) is their feelings for Byakuya Togami.

Or lack thereof.

Touko doesn’t know what’s wrong with her. She wants Byakuya to like her, of course, but she wants to like Byakuya, too. There’s everything there that she needs-- he has blonde hair, blue eyes, and a massive corporation. He’s everything Touko’s ever wanted, even if his personality is a bit cold. The pieces are all there, but for some reason, Touko can’t bring herself to feel for him even a bit.

***

Komaru Naegi is hopelessly average. Touko knows that as soon as she sees her. Komaru is just like her brother, except maybe even worse because for some unfathomable reason, she wants to be Touko’s friend.

Syo doesn’t get Komaru at all. For one, she’s persistent on being Syo’s friend. Syo has never even had a friend before, and she doesn’t want Komaru to be her first. Syo decides she doesn’t like Komaru.

Komaru is the absolute opposite of Byakuya. She has muddy green eyes and choppy brown hair, and doesn’t have a dollar to her name. Komaru is friendly, but also protective. She never makes fun of Touko or Syo- not even once.

Komaru has no redeeming qualities-- she’s not even that pretty, even if her eyes seem to shine when she talks about her family. Touko likes when she talks about her family, because she has a really nice smile.

Komaru is really pretty when she fights, and Touko thinks that if the main character of her books was real, she would look like Komaru. But she never tells Komaru that, because it’s weird. Komaru is gullible, which at first annoys Touko and Syo. But now when she falls for something, they get defensive of her. It isn’t Komaru’s fault that she’s a little airheaded.

Touko should not like Komaru. It’s not even that Komaru is bad, because she really isn’t now that Touko actually knows her. It’s that Komaru is a girl. Even if she is really kind and pretty and makes Touko feel different than she ever has about anyone, Komaru is a girl. Touko has two mothers, but she has a father, too. She knows that there has to be a man in the relationship. So she can’t love Komaru, because that isn’t right.

Komaru and Touko sleep in the same bed one night, and Touko hates that she enjoys it. She hates that there are no nightmares when Komaru is next to her, and she hates how safe she feels with the other.

When Touko gets back, she sees Byakuya again. This moment has been building up, she’s been thinking about it ever since she left, but when Byakuya is right there in front of her, she feels nothing.

Komaru tackles Makoto in a hug, causing the two of them to fall to the ground. Byakuya is smiling fondly at Makoto, and Touko knows she should be jealous. But she isn’t, because she’s smiling at Komaru, too. Makoto hugs Touko, and she winces. She likes Komaru’s hugs better.

She likes Komaru better.

***

Touko and Komaru sit on the couch of their shared apartment, and for the first time in a while, Touko feels relaxed. Komaru yawns and not-so-stealthily wraps her arm around Touko’s shoulder. Komaru is her best friend, even if she can be annoying.

“H-hey, Komaru?” Touko stares at her. Komaru retracts her hand.

“Yeah?” She smiles, and Touko’s heart aches.

“H-have you ever been in love?”

Komaru laughs awkwardly.

“Um, I think… maybe?”

Touko bites her lip.

“H-how did you know?”

“Well, when I see them, my heart beats faster and I get butterflies in my stomach. And I get nervous when I’m around them because I don’t want to mess stuff up. You’d probably know better than me, though, since you’re a writer.” Komaru giggles, and Touko gets butterflies in her stomach.

“W-what was h-his name?”

“Oh, uh, it wasn’t a guy.” Komaru gives her a crooked smirk. Touko’s eyes widen, and she stares at the floor as if it’s the most interesting thing in the world. “But I’m still not telling you what her name is.”

Touko nods, her head filled with questions.

***

Komaru takes Touko out on the roof one day, and they sit and watch the stars. Touko doesn’t get what’s so interesting about stars, but she lets Komaru tell her about them anyways.

“Pick a star.” Komaru says.

“Uh, t-that one.” Touko points to one.

“That’s our star now.” She moves closer to Touko and holds her hand. Touko doesn’t flinch.

“I-is that how it works?”

“No, but who cares?” Komaru grins. “It’s not like there’s anyone around to stop us.”

Touko turns to stare at her, and she notices how Komaru’s eyes aren’t muddy at all. They’re more the color of a pond, deep and green. Her cheeks are dusted pink, and she has light freckles dotted across her nose. She has a really nice nose, Touko observes. Her whole face is nice, really.

Komaru reaches over and takes her glasses, putting them over her own eyes. She laughs, saying something about how blind Touko is, but Touko is too focused on her dimples when she smiles to come up with a retort.

Komaru drops her head onto Touko’s shoulder. Touko takes a sharp breath in, unsure of what to do. Komaru puts her hands on Touko’s chest and props her leg up on Touko’s knee. It’s weird, because this is the most affection Touko’s ever been shown, and she’s on the roof of an apartment building with a girl that she’s maybe in love with but probably not.

Komaru has nice hands. They’re small, but not as small as Touko’s, and they’re completely without scars. Touko envies them, honestly. Komaru always tells her how pretty she is, though, and Komaru really isn’t a liar.

“Hey, Touko?” Komaru looks up at her. “Is everything okay? You’re shaking a lot.”

“D-do you hate me?”

“What? No way!” Komaru sits up and grabs Touko’s shoulders. “Of course not, you’re my best friend! Do you think I hate you?”

“I don’t know,” Touko looks down and fiddles with her hands. “I j-just don’t get why you like me at all…”

“Well, for starters, you’re really nice. Both of you are. And you’re super pretty, too. Honestly, I can’t find anything unlikable about you at all.”

“…”

“You are a good person, Touko. And an even better friend.” Komaru hugs her around her waist. “Okay?”

“O-okay.”

***

Komaru is hopelessly average at most things, including jewelry-making. The beads keep falling off the end of the bracelet she’s making, which causes Makoto to laugh. She pushes him, and his beads fall of the string, too. Kyoko laughs.

Komaru hands Touko the bracelet once she’s finished with it. The letters in the middle spell out _“BEST”,_ which Touko raises her eyebrows at. _Best what_? Komaru slings a matching one around her own wrist, and Touko makes out the word “ _FRIENDS_ ” aligned in the center, except the letter _F_ is just an _E_ with the bottom scratched off.

“Friendship bracelets!” Komaru grins, proudly showing off the bracelet on her wrist. Touko looks down at her own, her eyes beginning to water. No one’s ever made Touko anything before.

“Syo won’t get jealous, will she?” Komaru giggles, and Touko’s heart hurts. She wipes the tears from her eyes quickly and stares back at Komaru.

“T-thank you.” Touko fiddles with the bracelet. Komaru nods.

“You’re welcome! Look what Makoto made me!” She holds out another bracelet, this one with no words in the middle. The colors on each side remind Touko of a sunset, the pinks and oranges melting together.

“W-what is it?” Touko stares, not wanting to sound dumb.

“It’s the lesbian pride flag. Cool, right?”

“Y-yeah, cool…” Touko doesn’t know what that means, but whatever.

“What’s a lesbian?” Yasuhiro squints, rubbing his head.

“God, you’re an idiot.” Byakuya snorts, some semblance of a smile on his face. Aoi cracks up, biting her lip to keep laughter from coming out.

“Stop it, you guys!” Komaru smiles at him. “It means I like girls instead of guys.”

Touko’s entire world flips upside down at that. Was that a new thing? Was that always a thing, and Touko just never learned about it? It made sense, for sure, because Touko likes girls too. But she also likes guys sometimes, though probably not Byakuya.

“Oh, sick!” Yasuhiro says, interrupting her thoughts. “Tits or ass?”

“Oh my god.” Aoi covers her face in embarrassment. Kyoko sighs disappointedly.

“I-is it always one or the o-other?” Touko whispers. She feels embarrassed having to ask, but she really needs to know.

“No, not at all!” Komaru responds. Touko sighs, feeling relieved.

Later that night, Komaru hands her another bracelet. It’s pink, purple, and blue. Touko cocks her head at it.

“For both.” Komaru says, and she doesn’t need to explain any more. Touko gives her a sheepish smile and puts it on her left wrist, and Komaru fist-bumps her.

***

Komaru kisses Touko on top of the roof at night when everyone is up there with them. They came up originally to have a picnic-- Aoi even made donuts. Everything is fine until it starts raining, the seven of them ducking under a picnic table covered by an umbrella. Byakuya mumbles something about his suit getting wet, and Makoto gives him his hoodie. Aoi is completely unbothered, still munching on a powdered donut. Touko is huddled with her knees to her chest-- she hates getting wet. Komaru knows that, of course, so she squeezes her hand reassuringly. Touko thinks they’re just going to stay like that until the rain stops, but she feels a tugging on her arm and she’s now pulled out into the storm.

“W-what the hell!?” She hisses, Komaru laughing as the rain hits her head.

“Come on, we need to face your fears somehow!” Komaru wipes her wet bangs out of her eyes and smiles crookedly. Touko scowls, but doesn’t pull out of her grasp. Komaru isn’t going to hurt her.

Touko’s wet hair falls over her face and shoulders, causing her to grimace. She folds her hands over her chest, and Komaru laughs.

“Jeez, you’re like a cat!” Komaru grabs her by the waist and tightens her grip on her other hand. It occurs to Touko that they’re slow-dancing, with Komaru swaying side-to-side. It definitely sounds romantic, but it’s not exactly comfortable.

Komaru stands on her toes so she and Touko are face-to-face. Her nose is scrunched, face contorted into a cocky grin. She reaches up and puts both of her hands on Touko’s cheeks, leaning in and pressing a chaste kiss to her cheeks. The uncomfortable sensation of rain fades away, and she’s left with nothing but the feeling of bliss. She looks back at the others, but none of them seem to even care. It’s like she and Komaru are stuck in their own little world.

When Komaru finally pulls away, they’re both smiling. Komaru hugs her tightly and Touko for once hugs back. The rain’s stopped now, the sun coming back out from behind the clouds. It’s almost picture-perfect, save for the fact that they’re both totally soaked. Makoto waves them back over to the table, and Komaru hurries in his direction.

There’s a lot that Touko has to work out. But as she stares at the faces of her friends, she doesn’t feel any need to rush them.

Touko Fukawa has always done things a certain way, up until now. Now, Touko forgets about her routine, because consistency doesn’t matter now that the world has basically ended. It’ll be a while before she really learns to regulate her emotions, but at least for the time being, she’s making an effort. Touko doesn’t have to worry anymore, because she has someone.

She has Komaru, and that’s enough.

***

**Author's Note:**

> a message 4 my touko kinnies: you are loved and appreciated  
> a message 4 my komaru kinnies (me): please stop making among us jokes, everyone is tired of it and "SUSSY IMPOSTER" is really not that funny


End file.
